I’m sitting at my desk after school with a student who refused to use his class time wisely, so he is spending two hours with me after school to finish his argumentative essay. As he’s working, I’m left wondering how he sees me. Am I the witch who stole his precious free time? Am I the cyborg who doesn’t understand his feelings or emotions? Am I human, with thoughts and feelings just like his? I don’t know, and I really can’t ask. I care for my kids more than they will ever know, and that’s such a pity. They should know what they to me, and I try to show them, but if I’m the aforementioned witch/cyborg, can I even hope they see me as human?
Am I genuinely asking too much? Maybe.
It’s been real, and I’ll miss you in the upcoming week. Getting my students ready for ISTEP has been draining you, and I solemnly promise to replenish you during Spring Break. I feel like each time I lose you, I can never quite get all of you back; instead that empty spot where you were is filled with academic vocabulary, test taking strategies, and cheap, white wine.
But I need to refocus. I can’t go off on a tangent, and neither can my students. That will earn them zero points on the writing portion of the standardized test. So sanity, please, do me a solid. Hold on for a little bit longer. Give me the strength to guide my students to success. Give me the patience to forgive my students when they fail. And most importantly, give me the wisdom to know that I am only one person. I can only do so much.
Twenty-something Teacher Lady